According to this, 30 percent of people aged 18-29 years who use the internet are on dating apps. One thing is clear from this stat – mobile dating apps are not the taboo they were, anymore. You can meet your next girlfriend or boyfriend on a dating app and if things work out, introduce them to your family without having to prepare a backup story of how you two met.
Getting rid of this dating site taboo and social stigma means people are signing up for these apps more than ever. However, unfortunately for those who are actually looking for something meaningful, it also means threshing more chaff.
So, ladies and gentlemen, the big question posed to us today is how do I look for red flags on dating apps?
Well, to be quite frank, there is no set criterion that determines people who are not worth the effort. However, there are some big red flags that are commonly found in dating app profiles that you must be wary of. And we are going to list all of them for you.
We get it if someone wants potential partners to know they are looking for someone who would be fine with the kids or doesn’t smoke, etc – but what we don’t get are the material demands some make in their descriptions. For example, “you should do this…”, “I will not tolerate…”, or “you must not…”
A demanding attitude such as this is a big red flag early on. Would you be willing to invest your time and emotions on someone with a domineering and demanding attitude such as this?
Again, it’s important to remember there’s a fine line between expecting someone to be okay with a particular aspect of life and demanding material qualities from someone. As long as this boundary isn’t crossed, you’re safe!
- Indecisive date setters
Have you ever met someone on a dating site who seemed like a really nice person, really enthusiastic about meeting in person, but never managed to? Did they keep on calling the date off or changing plans last moment? Or did something “urgent” or “important” always came in the way and they had to either cancel plans or leave early?
Dating apps are for single people only, but unfortunately, many married men and women use it too. Sometimes it is to just troll and kill time, but other times the intentions are more nefarious.
There could be any number of reasons for all the canceled and postponed dates but more often than not, it is the sign of a married person. Remember to always look out for such suspicious activity especially if the other person can’t explain it.
- Lies and trickery
A very common ploy used by people on dating apps is to put someone else’s pictures – someone who is usually more physically attractive – and lie about their own physical description.
Now picture this scenario: you have found a guy/girl, you guys hit off and things seem to be going great. You have gotten to know each other better and you think this person could be your next serious relationship. One day, out of nowhere they confess their profile picture isn’t really theirs and they have lied in the description too.
They come clean about how it was all a way to get you to give them a chance and see their “inner beauty”.
What do you do now? You are somewhat emotionally attached – to forgive them or not? After all, the whole ploy led you to see them for who they really are, right?
People who trick others into talking to them this way aren’t the “poor souls” they portray themselves to be. They are insecure people with a lack of confidence in their own abilities, who instead use cunning and trickery to lure other people. Lying about their physical appearance could just be the tip of the iceberg; what more could they be hiding?
- Formal letter-like greetings
When it comes to dating apps, the number of men usually outweighs the number of women. This means women have more options to choose from and are more likely to be picky.
A lot of men try to increase their chances of sparking a conversation by sending messages to more women. Now, this wouldn’t be so bad if…those messages were personalized and not a part of a mass messaging campaign. Yes, ladies believe it or not if you get a message starting like this, “Hello there! Your bio has me curious about you, and I’d love to know more!”
Chances are you are not the first recipient. In fact, it has been probably been sent to a hundred other girls whom the sender found even remotely attractive. If he can’t put in the effort to send you a message that actually shows he cared enough to do read up on you, what makes you think he’ll put in the effort later?
- The critic
The topic of past relationships is one that can give a lot of insights about the other person to both the parties. When talking about their last relationship, are they overly critical about everything their ex did? Has the “my ex was crazy” sentence come up? If the answer to either of these questions is a yes, you need to be careful.
Remember, while it is possible the ex really was crazy, you can’t know for sure. The person you are talking to could also be the one at fault!
Dating apps were created to make finding romantic partners easier. Unfortunately, the layers of deceit that seem to come as add-ons have made it anything but so. You need to keep your eyes peeled back to avoid wasting your time and to only put your efforts in people who deserve it.